Joint-Custody As A Post-Divorce Intervention

by: Iris Hackermeier

Table of Content

1 Single Parenthood 3

2 Invisible Fatherhood  4

3 Need for both parents  5

3.1 Custody Comparison  5
3.2 Fatherhood Programs 7
3.3 Discussion  9

4 Conclusion  11

References 12
 

1 Single Parenthood

Western society contains beside the most common “nuclear” family model, one-parentfamilies as well and this is not a recent phenomenon. While in the beginning of the 20th century the primary reason the death of one parent was, we can rate divorce as today’s cause number one (Schmidt, 2002).

First, the changes emerged through better health care and life in peace, which reduced the death of a parent through birth struggles or war. Second, the emancipation of women questioned reasons for marriage first time in history. A couple did not stay together anymore because of dependencies like finances, health care, standard of living or societal image. Even children cannot hinder a divorce in today’s life because of institutional and governmental support, like daycare, for one-parent families. We can hardly talk about a traditional family form we can lean on; there has always been an enormous range. The high rate of divorces (listed in Figure 1) shows, that especially the “mother-fatherchild- family” is an ideal but no real situation. However, it can only be an ideal family formation when all the members are satisfied and feel comfortable. By thinking of problems within a family, it might often be better for the child when parents get separated. Thus, what is best for a child? On the one hand single parents often have to struggle with many problems of financial and parenting issues. The child has to deal with the separation of the other parent and of friends when they move to another place after divorce. These children get often characterized as underachievers in school and show higher aggression at home and in school. Though, parent’s separation can be seen as an extension of the family on the other hand because it leads to a so-called blended family. This means the children live with a stepparent and have the possibility to expand their social contacts. They can live in a wide social network and the loss of one person in a large network is not as high as the loss of a person in a nuclear family formation. A big family system contains enough contacts, so this caring organism can hardly break down (cp. Théry, 1998, p. 27).

Figure 1: Cross-cultural comparison of divorce rates (EFG, 2002) [figure only in downloadfile]

2 Invisible Fatherhood

The title of this section emerges from an article, which complains about information about the father that does not get collected by the birth of a child in the United States. Authorities as well as studies, intervention programs and supporting groups are focusing on the mother, while fathers are an unknown, invisible group (Speak et al, 1997). Looking to the needs of a mother and a child is usual in Western society but does not necessarily mean that the father is an unimportant variable in the parenting process.

Many myths and counter myths of bad and worthless fatherhood exist in peoples mind. Media takes part in the campaign against fathers but peoples general belief, that “child and household belongs to the mother, and earning money is a fathers task”, does support certain bias as well. “Fathers never pay child support and the children and the mother have to live in poverty” or “Men are not interested in their children and the mother has to deal with all the problems alone” are common statements about fathers. There are interventions going on, that help mothers to get more child support and recent programs even try to get better contact between a father and his children. It seems ironic when we think about abandoned men, financial ruined and sick of desire for his children. In Germany a court ordered visiting arrangement allows a father to see his child every second weekend, which is less than 20 percent of the child’s time – compared to the mother, who shares almost 70 percent of the child’s time (depending on the age, amount of time is decreasing by increasing age, because of the time spend at school and with friends).

Only few people, mostly relatives and friends, realize that these people are suffering from the transition of being a full-time parent to a part-time parent, from dealing with the ex-wife and being always dependent from her cooperation (Nicholls and Pike, 1998). Fathers commonly complain that mothers argue about visitation, are unwilling to change visitation on father’s request, but change visitation themselves on a short notice. It seems as mothers have the upper hand in the divorce process. Pagels (2002) even mentions blackmail, while a mother allows the father visitation of his child when he pays enough child support. It is not surprising that some of the divorced men try to keep a distance between themselves and the children, because they can not stand the psychological pressure through ex-wives anymore. The few existing studies about the role of a father in post-divorce time, list many positive influences when children can spend an equal amount of time with their father. This is the reason why recent literature recommends joint custody as a basic intervention for enhancing parenting skills. The third paragraph of this essay introduces two joint-custody supporting studies, by looking to barriers for non-residential fathers and positive effects for children.

3 Need for both parents

3.1 Custody Comparison

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